I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
