it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
