I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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