wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
