weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Randomize
