Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize