um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
