She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
