what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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