oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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