im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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