I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
