Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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