I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
