When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
