got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I can feel your judgement through the phone
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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