He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
