i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize
