is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
