didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize