No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize