this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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