I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
