I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
