the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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