I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
