i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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