he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
My vagina is officially offended.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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