hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I just forgot I was standing up.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
