if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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