Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
