I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
