So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize