Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
