Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
