She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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