he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I need water and some morals
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
