i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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