Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
