Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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