The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
