Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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