ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
