you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
