why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
