dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
That accounts for only three of the penises
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
