yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
