Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?

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(404): View more from Georgia

think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...

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(256): View more from Alabama

I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.

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(216): View more from Ohio

She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened

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(303): View more from Colorado

I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.

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(647): View more from Ontario

hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"

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(907): View more from Alaska

I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."

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(317): View more from Indiana

If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife

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