whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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