its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
