We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Randomize
