I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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